dreams left
and i sit here in your father's house
again someplace i don't belong
it's cold and i can feel my skin prickling
you're playing piano
a rondeau of some sort
a soft tinkling melody that years of practice has eased into your hands
suddenly you stop
kissing the man i love makes it hard to play
you start again
are you aware that i am here?
you stop again
or are you too aware?
it's silent
i only here the dull thud of the clock, striking every second away
from my life
more silence
if i were to walk out of the room now
i would see you kissing him, touching him
i hear your voice, sweet, soothing, low
counterpoint to your silent piano
you open the door, open the curtain of the window, check on me
smiling with him
you leave
i shut the door, shut the curtain
i know he is happy
i know it should be enough
i turn on my music
the senseless melody pours out
i don't want to hear anything
i don't want to hear the nothing I'm hearing
dreams are nothing but they turn me from reality
i wish i had dreams left
i sit here, waiting to dream again, in your father's house
it's so cold and goosebumps rise to my skin
i want a place to belong
and i want you to play the piano again